I Hunted God Down – He Set Me Straight
I was going through a terrible time in my life, where I went to church my whole life and then things just got worse and worse till one day I was sitting in a church and I heard Jesus say, “You won’t find me here.” I was going from church to church searching for him saying, “Where are you God?” I was so frustrated with him I would throw things at my ceiling, but it never reached him lol. That was when he took me on a journey of teaching me his people are his church and most churches are corrupted not even teaching his full truths. They are missing things of the spirit and it’s all about man-made religious rituals. God is not in control! I am not saying all churches are like this, but many were. The Lord came to me and wanted to be the only one in my ear at first, and he became my teacher. Many have experienced this apart from me. This narrow walk through the fire with the Lord that most won’t understand until they have been through it.
I learned from my past church that prophecy was only for those in the bible times and speaking in tongues was also past stuff. I am pretty sure I even made fun of some speaking in tongues in a joking way after a friend took me to her church where they were all speaking in a strange way to me. I also learned Jesus was just the son of God, so to me he felt separate from God or not as important. My old religion was that the water baptism and spirit baptism was the same thing, so there was no need to ask for the spirit baptism. Wow, did Jesus show me different. This was my own truth or religion and what I was sticking too. I had no clue what God was going to teach me after one day asking for his full truth no matter what I learned, because after hearing him say in a small voice, “You won’t find me here”…I knew he was trying to say something. I knew I never truly knew him deeply all the years I went to church. I was going through the motions. However, I had a love and deep respect for him. It took God a while to convince me these were his truths, but he was very consistent and he came teaching and speaking like rain. I had no one else teaching me but him, and yes I found out God actually does speak to his people. Not just a distant thought or guess, but a voice. My sheep hear my voice~Jesus said!
Many preachers, teachers, disciples, or prophets etc… in these organizations were never anointed or have the holy spirit by God to teach his truths, so they are way off or confusing the body of Christ. Like the blind leading the blind. God still chooses his leaders today. A leader is being led by God himself, by his spirit teaching. How can you lead a flock, if you are not close enough to hear the shepherd teaching? God will manifest himself to them John 14:21. Why do you think Paul asked the two minister disciples if they were also baptized in spirit (holy ghost)? They told him they were only baptized in John’s water baptism. So Paul baptized them in Jesus spirit and they received the gift of tongues and could prophesy after that ACTS 19:1-6. My old religious mindset was way off…God is the same and he will do the same today!
Backtracking to when I was younger in elementary, God showed me two scriptural dreams that I later found out were biblical truth I did not know. Also, at the age of 18 I saw a vision of a man and women in the sky in line art. I knew this meant God was writing my love story one day, but I dismissed it as a dream back then, but it never left my thoughts bc it felt like a message. I knew it was a message and later he proved that to be true. I have gotten visions of line art a lot in things he gives me sometimes and he has been talking about this supernatural marriage he is fully involved in.
One day he spoke audibly to me while I lay in bed wanting to die from how cruel people in the world were to me and I felt he just did not care about me anymore bc of what was happening all around me. I was loosing everything including my religion and then one morning Jesus spoke and said, “Do You Trust Me?” I had no clue what he meant back then, but I was so happy to hear him I tried to share it with people. I was called crazy by some, but I didn’t care bc I was just excited to know Jesus actually speaks audibly too. This was the start of God being able to move, when I was empty of the world & it’s ways. I wanted to know what was really his truth and not man’s idea of it and what God wanted to say truly. God was now a reality and not just a thought.
For two years prior to this I would cry every single day. I was not divorced yet, but my ex wanted to divorce. I spent about 4 years going through separation and sadness until finally was divorced. I even begged him to change his heart for our kids, but nothing changed his heart and God told me to let him go. I could not hold back the tears and driving to work, at work or driving home and then when I got home it just seemed like floods of tears. I was so lost in my heart and broken. I wanted out of this world. I remember crying out to God in my closet on my knee’s one day with everything in me. Then all of a sudden a strange language came out of my mouth that made me stop crying, but I started to cry again and it did it again and this time I completely stopped. It made me stronger, but I had no clue what happened to me that day so I let it go. Later, I found out from the Lord I was given the gift of tongues and I activated the spirit to speak louder. The attacks spiritually came stronger after this. I could now see & hear into the spiritual world stronger and feel it. My world was about to change completely.
God hunted me down & made me a “Prophetic Watchmen & His Bride”
Through the process of divorce I could start to see the demonic side inside of people more and more. My spiritual eyes were open. I felt so defeated back then bc I was not only going through divorce but finding out how real spiritual battle was, I would just lay in bed for hours crying or sad. I felt worthless and I was very angry at God for everything. Little did I know he was setting me up for a better walk with him and future. God little by little started giving me visions or words to encourage me, and one day I remember where he showed me a vision that meant he was turning half my world upside down. I saw Jesus on half of the world with his full army of white angel soldiers and horses. Jesus was in the center of them staring out very serious like ready for battle. This was him preparing me to be refined and used as a vessel. He was also gonna fight for me. I later saw an image online very similar to this vision, so he gave someone else this same vision. He taught me about the holy spirit baptism and I saw him doing it while feeling the holy spirit winds. It was Jesus bc I opened my eyes slightly to see his white robe by my bed. He taught me through scriptures and proof, that he was God who came down in flesh to teach us and die for us 1 Timothy 3:16. I felt him anoint me in the spirit, but back then I was unclear why he did this. Later he spoke to me that I am one of his prophetic watchmen. He showed me many times I am his bride also. This was all crazy to me and I struggled with this calling at first.
7 So thou, O son of man, I have set thee a watchman unto the house of Israel; therefore thou shalt hear the word at my mouth, and warn them from me.
The only thing I asked of God at this point was to marry a minister because I felt I could not get that close to God as much as a man of God could. God had other plans I never dreamed of. I became frustrated with men also after my divorce bc my whole life they disappointed me in relationships or the way they treated woman all around me. I was done with relationships! It was at this time God started speaking and told me he had a husband. I was not even divorced yet when he first sent an angel in a dream to tell me he had me a husband, so I wasn’t sure if I believed it was from him, but the Lord see’s the future. Then he said a second time prophetically. He said he had me a strong man. Then a third time after divorce, “A strong man from the strong one.” At this point I was convinced, ok I think God is really sending me a husband. My earlier prophecy at 18 was true. He was writing my love story, but it was not just a story about a man, but a love story of me and him also.
After this, The prophecy came like rain and instead of being flooded with tears, I was now flooded with him! These also came daily after I made fun of a prophet who also got daily visions. I struggled to believe that prophecy was for today, but God proved me wrong! I see 100’s of visions of Jesus and his current position or words as well as him teaching me his truth. I hear messages from him and his angels. I even have seen visions of my strong man and wedding stuff. I also have experienced the many miracles of him showing me predictions of people to come or things to come. I never doubted God’s existence again though my whole life I knew I had a calling from him. It was a deep knowing and things happening in my life that I could not ignore. Now I was hunted down by God and the journey with him has not been easy let me tell you, but truly amazing and he was totally worth it and faithful in all of it. As you can see in my entries, I wrestle with him a lot, but guess who always wins lol. This sounds strange, but I think God likes a good tussel with us esp in learning or growing…It shows we acknowledge him as real and he reveals it’s his strength not ours that will get us through. God came and spoke confidence in my broken spirit and said I am “Worthy” where I felt worthless! I am continuing to learn and grow with God. I don’t think we will ever stop growing with him bc he likes to do “new” things Isaiah 43:19. There is layers of the bible that we have only touched the surface of. I’m still waiting on the strong man promise. That’s another chapter 🙂
Jesus is my love and King….Kim (His Bride & Prophetic Watchman)
1 John 2:27 But the anointing which ye have received of him abideth in you, and ye need not that any man teach you: but as the same anointing teacheth you of all things, and is truth, and is no lie, and even as it hath taught you, ye shall abide in him.