I wanted to share the real struggles I have been going through for years and God’s message to me about it to encourage other’s in their calling who are also his bride. They are coming so much even my son who lives with me said “They never stop.” This last storm I also recognized as a storm as well as test, but didn’t want to walk away because it felt like it numbed my sadness. I am tired of losing people I care for. The holy spirit was convicting me so much I had no choice and I obeyed. I was laying in bed and thinking, “I want out of this world-this is too much God.” My spiritual eyes now see the reasons behind why it all happens and It’s a lot to handle. I was in bed and then saw a vision, a dream, and a message came to me in the spirit from God.
Vision: I saw this chat box pop up in discord…like how I was messaging another friend I just lost and was sad over, but the messages to the friend were grayed out. Then I saw a new message being written and it said “You are, “The office of a Prophet.” I knew instantly God sent the message.
Dream: Directly after this I had a dream and I was in a large high corporation building with a secretary and it was like she wanted to be my friend at first. We were having fun and laughing. Then I knew that I had a calling on my life so I got my things together and put on a black bridal veil and books laptop to go to train for God. I was thinking why am I wearing a black and not white veil? It hit my spirit that it was from all my mourning and suffering during training, but I would get a white veil after to be the bride of Christ. The girl at this point started making fun of me and thinking I was crazy. I just picked up my things and walked to the offices to find one where I could be alone to study. I then saw all these offices and they were many corporations. Some were of different languages even. Many of the offices were empty and the lights were off, but some had meetings in them.
Message: After this dream I heard the word “USA”
Interpretation: The holy spirit gave me the interpretations instantly. Because I decided not to accept or stay in the test of desire, fun, or sin like many others over doing what God asked, he was giving/reminding me that he gave me a higher calling as “the office of the prophet.” The corporations/nations was where he may send us as prophets. The girl making fun of me, represented all the people I have encountered that said I was crazy for not just having fun like everyone else in sin or desire or with counterfeits. The black veil represented all the suffering/mourning for loss of friends/family a prophet goes through in training. The office is where the prophets train alone at first, but then once done we will get our white veil as the bride of Christ and he may send us to corporations or nations as one of God’s trusted prophets. If we are approved. The offices that were empty, were the ones who rejected their calling from God and stayed in the desires of their own. They did not accept the call.
The lord sent me something one time that said “Tested to be trusted”….it hit my spirit that he was showing me why I go through so much more then some others. If I can walk away from temptation, sin and desire for God…over and over again…These are the test he gives his bride to be approved. They are not easy and why so many stay in their desires over their callings. I’m gonna be honest I still don’t fully understand “the office of a prophet” he has given me…but God keeps teaching and speaking despite my imperfections in it. The desire to be this is not really there as much, because I have bad social anxiety as well as I’ve also seen how the devil easily manipulates people and uses them against me since God started speaking to me. We have a choice to accept our calling, but my desire to see him fully operate in my life and to please him always outweigh my fears and struggles. I also wanted to share for others hurting and discouraged who are called by God.
The test I have constantly got the most have been to walk away from the things I love the most if it was not right by God. If God revealed it or if a person was not also walking or desiring to follow/obey God over desires/fun/sin. We have a choice. Our hearts can easily deceive us and we are tested in all area’s of weakness. I knew this and was aware this was only numbing my pain temporarily and my suffering would still come as part of my testing. If I stayed, I could lose my gifts, calling or even become spiritually blind like a lot of the world is. God has also revealed many times to me to help other’s see the same test. I realized so many stay in sin to numb pain because it is easier, but in the end after the testing God is showing me there is reward and there will be an end to this much suffering. Obedience and testing is for a reason and a purpose greater then ourselves. I can honestly say this….I am getting stronger with every thing I am asked to walk away from. Pain is temporary and so is this life. We have to choose eternity with him over the temporary desires of the world. Seek first the kingdom and all these things will be added…they will come after you are tested to be approved and God will be in it.